Life from a caffeine hyped point of view

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What do you fear?

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There is a commonly used ice-breaker in team building sessions that consists of anonymously writing your greatest fear on a slip of paper which is then shared with the group. The point of the exercise is to walk in the other person’s shoes for a bit. Slips are placed in an envelope and everyone in the group pulls one and says what they think.

Every time I have participate in this exercise the outcome is similar, people try to guess what the other person is thinking, it has also provided an insight into perception and our need to constantly solve other people’s problems instead of understanding that it really has nothing to do with us and our purpose is just to be.  The themes are usually common, failure, death, illness, financial security, we find out that maybe we’re not so different after all. 

In a group that I was in, someone had listed their fear of dying of cancer. Now that I can understand all to well. It’s the number one killer in my own family and it comes very close to home. But you know, I refuse to let it govern my life, and I am extremely resentful of people who use it to attempt to coerce me into things. Several years ago an insurance agent, who knew me was trying to twist my arm over an insurance policy, her fatal mistake, mentioning my “situation”. Her take, you’re going to die of cancer because some of your family did. Well hold up a moment there. I know I’m going to die, that’s the only certainty in life after all. But why would I spend my entire time agonising about it? Thanks, I prefer to enjoy my time here and when the end comes I’d like to be sliding into where ever waving a bar of Valrohna chocolate in one hand, a glass of red in the other, screeching YEE HA, I certainly lived! Sure I try to eat well, exercise and generally take care of myself but I refuse to be a cringing, frightened, shaking shell constantly anticipating the worst. 
So what might be my greatest fear? The fear of not trying things because I’m afraid to live.



Written by coffeewallah

June 28, 2008 at 11:06 pm

Posted in Uncategorized

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